This video is really something special. If you're tired of blurry, grainy YouTube fare, Joaquin Baldwin's video Sebastian's Voodoo is a really beautiful piece of film: (CAUTION: Not G-Rated)
Sebastian's Voodoo from Joaquin Baldwin.
I'm just blown away by how expressive it was, even without any words. And it's certainly a powerful message about sacrifice. Absolutely wonderful.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
March Books Read
I gave myself the task of keeping track of every book I read for a year. I started this month, and this is what I have so far:
Watchmen by Alan Moore
Silent in the Sanctuary by Deanna Raybourn
Valiant by Holly Black
Ironside by Holly Black
Magic in the Wind by Christine Feehan
Maisie Dobbs by Jacqueline Winspear
Cover Her Face by P. D. James
Silent on the Moor by Deanna Raybourn
Blindness by José Saramago
The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde
Witch Fire by Anya Bast
A Hunger Like No Other by Kresley Cole
Midnight Alley by Rachel Caine
Watchmen by Alan Moore
Silent in the Sanctuary by Deanna Raybourn
Valiant by Holly Black
Ironside by Holly Black
Magic in the Wind by Christine Feehan
Maisie Dobbs by Jacqueline Winspear
Cover Her Face by P. D. James
Silent on the Moor by Deanna Raybourn
Blindness by José Saramago
The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde
Witch Fire by Anya Bast
A Hunger Like No Other by Kresley Cole
Midnight Alley by Rachel Caine
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Blindness
The most recent piece of fiction I've read is Blindness by Jose Saramago. I just finished it & it is a tough book to read alone. I want to talk about it, even though there isn't that much to say. It was hard to get through, but I read it very quickly. It tooks less than twelve hours from start to finish with plenty of breaks for eating, sleeping, etc.
The author's writing style is dense -- at times almost incomprehensible -- in a way that I think has little to do with its translation from Portuguese to English. He uses little punctuation. In fact, none other than periods, commas and the occasional apostrophe to show possession. The sentences are extremely long and the dialoge broken up by commas and capital letters -- it is impossible at times to even discern who is speaking.
I got over all of the above pretty quickly, and there is just one device that bothers me still. There are no names given in the book. Occasionally when people are asked outright for their names, they make comments such as this one which was provided by an author to the doctor's wife: What is your name, Blind people do not need a name, I am my voice, nothing else matters, But you wrote books and those books carry your name, said the doctor's wife, Now nobody can read them it is as if they do not exist.
This is the one device that I have been unable to swallow. More than sighted people, blind people needs names, I should think. One of the characters is "the girl with the dark glasses" which is a very specific descriptor. She refers to herself as such, as do other characters. Which is fine. If you could see that would easily help distinguish her from the others. But if you were blind wouldn't it just be easier to refer to her as "Julia" and link the name with the voice in your mind?
I mean, I honestly don't think that if I was in a room with a bunch of blind people and began speaking & replied that I was "the girl in the purple top" when asked for my name that they would be satisfied with that.
I'm sure (I'm hoping) I'm missing some symbolism or allegory here. Because, if I'm not, that seems like a pretty big mistake.
The author's writing style is dense -- at times almost incomprehensible -- in a way that I think has little to do with its translation from Portuguese to English. He uses little punctuation. In fact, none other than periods, commas and the occasional apostrophe to show possession. The sentences are extremely long and the dialoge broken up by commas and capital letters -- it is impossible at times to even discern who is speaking.
I got over all of the above pretty quickly, and there is just one device that bothers me still. There are no names given in the book. Occasionally when people are asked outright for their names, they make comments such as this one which was provided by an author to the doctor's wife: What is your name, Blind people do not need a name, I am my voice, nothing else matters, But you wrote books and those books carry your name, said the doctor's wife, Now nobody can read them it is as if they do not exist.
This is the one device that I have been unable to swallow. More than sighted people, blind people needs names, I should think. One of the characters is "the girl with the dark glasses" which is a very specific descriptor. She refers to herself as such, as do other characters. Which is fine. If you could see that would easily help distinguish her from the others. But if you were blind wouldn't it just be easier to refer to her as "Julia" and link the name with the voice in your mind?
I mean, I honestly don't think that if I was in a room with a bunch of blind people and began speaking & replied that I was "the girl in the purple top" when asked for my name that they would be satisfied with that.
I'm sure (I'm hoping) I'm missing some symbolism or allegory here. Because, if I'm not, that seems like a pretty big mistake.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Mama Needs a New Set of Wheels
Mr. Tastykake is in our home office diligently studying hard for his promotion exam. {It's Wednesday morning -- cross your fingers, blog readers!} If he gets it, I get a car! Yay!
I keep bringing him caffeine and saying encouraging things like, "Remember, mama needs a new set of wheels."
Just now he asked me to "stop being creepy."
Apparently in my world there's a fine line between "encouraging" and "creepy" and I don't know when I've crossed that line.
I keep bringing him caffeine and saying encouraging things like, "Remember, mama needs a new set of wheels."
Just now he asked me to "stop being creepy."
Apparently in my world there's a fine line between "encouraging" and "creepy" and I don't know when I've crossed that line.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Weightloss Update & A Little YouTube
First, I am still doing well on the weightloss front. Despite endless whining about how hard life is, I am still on track to meet my goal of 195 by July 1, 2009. I have some social commitments in August and December for which I want to lose even more weight, but the big focus is on getting in a workout five days a week and eating moderately. For some reason, if I'm consistent with that it seems to take the weight off pretty well -- who knew?
I've been having fun making these little YouTube videos & enjoying a sort of trial by fire learning system with Adobe Premiere Elements. I've been focusing on editing and voice over narration & not on fancy transitions and effects but that may come later. Right now I'd like to add some music, so I'm on the hunt for a "good" royalty free CD. If such a thing even exists.
The pictures in this video were taken on a recent troll through Coral Gables. This church is the oldest public building in Coral Gables and was built in the 1920s.
I hope you enjoy!
Oh, and don't forget to buy your sweetie something nice for Valentine's Day! After all, Saint Valentine, Patron Saint of Holy Marriage would be sorely disappointed if even a few people missed out on the giant orgy of pink hearts and edible body chocolate that marks his feast day.
I've been having fun making these little YouTube videos & enjoying a sort of trial by fire learning system with Adobe Premiere Elements. I've been focusing on editing and voice over narration & not on fancy transitions and effects but that may come later. Right now I'd like to add some music, so I'm on the hunt for a "good" royalty free CD. If such a thing even exists.
The pictures in this video were taken on a recent troll through Coral Gables. This church is the oldest public building in Coral Gables and was built in the 1920s.
I hope you enjoy!
Oh, and don't forget to buy your sweetie something nice for Valentine's Day! After all, Saint Valentine, Patron Saint of Holy Marriage would be sorely disappointed if even a few people missed out on the giant orgy of pink hearts and edible body chocolate that marks his feast day.
Friday, February 06, 2009
On the Nightstand
One thing I've been doing more in Miami than I did in NOVA is reading. I love to read. My favorite way to pass the time during summer vacation was to stay up all night finishing a book I'd just started that morning. What a treat!
I just finished Bitter is the New Black by Jen Lancaster. It was recommended to me by a friend. Who recommended it because the main character (it's a memoir, so the author, really) reminded her of me. What a bitch! I mean, I agree, but still ... it's really not nice to say to someone, Hey! I was reading this memoir entitled Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office and the main character totally reminded me of you! Oh? Really? The egomaniacal one, you mean?
Now, I did think the book was freaking hilarious, and, honestly, yes, the main character and I do have more in common than I thought at first blush. I have never carried a Prada bag to the unemployment office, but then, I've never been eligible to receive unemployment before, either. When I "lost" my job and moved down here it wasn't my choice, but it also wasn't involuntary. After all, I like my husband. I wanted to hang out with him. I didn't feel like commuting from Miami to DC. Weird, huh?
But I was close to the top of my field. I spent money like it grew on trees. I soothed my stressed out soul with expensive things. I got fat. And I grew up when I couldn't do any of that anymore. Now I just need to lose some weight and figure out how to sucker someone into paying me to do it. I considered The Biggest Loser, but my sister doesn't think they'd take me. I asked her why not -- I certainly feel fat enough -- but she said she thinks it's because I already eat right and work out and in general am just not pathetic enough. I had to agree.
Damn that ego.
I just finished Bitter is the New Black by Jen Lancaster. It was recommended to me by a friend. Who recommended it because the main character (it's a memoir, so the author, really) reminded her of me. What a bitch! I mean, I agree, but still ... it's really not nice to say to someone, Hey! I was reading this memoir entitled Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office and the main character totally reminded me of you! Oh? Really? The egomaniacal one, you mean?
Now, I did think the book was freaking hilarious, and, honestly, yes, the main character and I do have more in common than I thought at first blush. I have never carried a Prada bag to the unemployment office, but then, I've never been eligible to receive unemployment before, either. When I "lost" my job and moved down here it wasn't my choice, but it also wasn't involuntary. After all, I like my husband. I wanted to hang out with him. I didn't feel like commuting from Miami to DC. Weird, huh?
But I was close to the top of my field. I spent money like it grew on trees. I soothed my stressed out soul with expensive things. I got fat. And I grew up when I couldn't do any of that anymore. Now I just need to lose some weight and figure out how to sucker someone into paying me to do it. I considered The Biggest Loser, but my sister doesn't think they'd take me. I asked her why not -- I certainly feel fat enough -- but she said she thinks it's because I already eat right and work out and in general am just not pathetic enough. I had to agree.
Damn that ego.
Monday, February 02, 2009
Why Is Your Blog Called "Inside the Tastykake Truck"?
This is a question I've been asked before. A related question I receive is why do I refer to my husband as Mr. Tatsykake? The quick answer: it's a privacy issue. The long answer: well, you asked for it.
My husband works in a high-security field. I don't know what that field is, technically, nor do I know what it is, exactly, that he does, as all those things are above my current level of security clearance. Which, in case you were wondering, is lower than that of a journalist from the Weekly World News. Anyway, when we first got involved, he had to report all my information to his work. I presume it was so they could do a background check and ensure that I hadn't been the top story on America's Most Wanted at any point. Fine. Whatever.
Then things started to get weird. I moved into an apartment in Fairfax right about that time (the apartment I had been living in went through a painful condo conversion -- yuck) and noticed that there was always a Tastykake truck parked in the lot behind my building. That truck was always there. Always. It never moved. It was like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory -- nobody ever went in and nobody ever came out. It did not matter what time of day or day of the week it was, it never moved from that spot.
So I began to think to myself: that's odd. After all, if it was a real Tastykake Truck, wouldn't it have to go out at some point and pick up large quantities of Tastykakes? And then drive all over town dropping them off at grocery stores and 7-Elevens? But it didn't. Not even once. So then I thought, obviously it is not a real Tastykake truck. It must be a front for something. Either something shady or something government. Or both. You never know.
So my roommate and I used to speculate on what went on inside the Tastykake Truck. Was it FBI agents on surveillance? Was there a mafioso or terrorist living in our apartment complex? Or was it a traveling sex club? A portal to another world? A vampire nest? There were so many possibilities! The Tastykake Truck became a huge source of entertainment. I even wrote part of a novel loosely based on the whole situation -- don't ask.
Anyway, fast forward one year. My apartment complex is starting to get on my nerves and they raised the rent a ridiculous amount. Adios. So I pack up all my stuff and move down the street. Literally. Like, maybe a half a mile. And I move into my new apartment (different complex, gated community this time) and I get settled in. And then I notice it.
The Tastykake Truck.
There is a Tastykake Truck parked right outside my building.
And guess what? Yeah, you got it. It never moves. Never.
So now I'm starting to think that this whole thing is really weird. I mean, what are the chances? That the owner of the Tastykake Truck and I would move from the exact same apartment complex to the exact same apartment complex a block down the road that same weekend? Or that, if they were different Tastykake Trucks (they all look the same to me, how would I know?) that there were two drivers living in such close proximaty to each other? And that neither of them ever left to pick up cakes or deliver them? No, the odds were stacked too high for this to be a) legitimate or b) a coincidence.
The answer was clear. It was the same Tastykake Truck and it was filled with FBI agents or DHS agents who were tapping my phones and reading my email and falling asleep on their keyboards from the sheer boredom of having to monitor my life. Because, let's face it, all I ever did was work. When I wasn't working (rare) I was talking about work (snooze).
Anyway, so I started telling people about the truck on the phone. I started posting about the Tastykake Truck online on message boards and writing about it in emails. People thought the story was hilarious. And you know what else? The truck went away. They were listening to my conversations and reading my emails so they knew I was onto them. They had to ditch the Tastykake Truck.
That's when they switched to a Cox Cable van. But that's not nearly as fun to type as "Tastykake Truck", so I left them alone after that.
And so my husband became known as Mr. Tastykake on some of my MBs because I had never told anyone his name for privacy reasons, and also because it's just such a fun word: Tastykake. Tastykake, tastykake, tastykake!
My husband works in a high-security field. I don't know what that field is, technically, nor do I know what it is, exactly, that he does, as all those things are above my current level of security clearance. Which, in case you were wondering, is lower than that of a journalist from the Weekly World News. Anyway, when we first got involved, he had to report all my information to his work. I presume it was so they could do a background check and ensure that I hadn't been the top story on America's Most Wanted at any point. Fine. Whatever.
Then things started to get weird. I moved into an apartment in Fairfax right about that time (the apartment I had been living in went through a painful condo conversion -- yuck) and noticed that there was always a Tastykake truck parked in the lot behind my building. That truck was always there. Always. It never moved. It was like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory -- nobody ever went in and nobody ever came out. It did not matter what time of day or day of the week it was, it never moved from that spot.
So I began to think to myself: that's odd. After all, if it was a real Tastykake Truck, wouldn't it have to go out at some point and pick up large quantities of Tastykakes? And then drive all over town dropping them off at grocery stores and 7-Elevens? But it didn't. Not even once. So then I thought, obviously it is not a real Tastykake truck. It must be a front for something. Either something shady or something government. Or both. You never know.
So my roommate and I used to speculate on what went on inside the Tastykake Truck. Was it FBI agents on surveillance? Was there a mafioso or terrorist living in our apartment complex? Or was it a traveling sex club? A portal to another world? A vampire nest? There were so many possibilities! The Tastykake Truck became a huge source of entertainment. I even wrote part of a novel loosely based on the whole situation -- don't ask.
Anyway, fast forward one year. My apartment complex is starting to get on my nerves and they raised the rent a ridiculous amount. Adios. So I pack up all my stuff and move down the street. Literally. Like, maybe a half a mile. And I move into my new apartment (different complex, gated community this time) and I get settled in. And then I notice it.
The Tastykake Truck.
There is a Tastykake Truck parked right outside my building.
And guess what? Yeah, you got it. It never moves. Never.
So now I'm starting to think that this whole thing is really weird. I mean, what are the chances? That the owner of the Tastykake Truck and I would move from the exact same apartment complex to the exact same apartment complex a block down the road that same weekend? Or that, if they were different Tastykake Trucks (they all look the same to me, how would I know?) that there were two drivers living in such close proximaty to each other? And that neither of them ever left to pick up cakes or deliver them? No, the odds were stacked too high for this to be a) legitimate or b) a coincidence.
The answer was clear. It was the same Tastykake Truck and it was filled with FBI agents or DHS agents who were tapping my phones and reading my email and falling asleep on their keyboards from the sheer boredom of having to monitor my life. Because, let's face it, all I ever did was work. When I wasn't working (rare) I was talking about work (snooze).
Anyway, so I started telling people about the truck on the phone. I started posting about the Tastykake Truck online on message boards and writing about it in emails. People thought the story was hilarious. And you know what else? The truck went away. They were listening to my conversations and reading my emails so they knew I was onto them. They had to ditch the Tastykake Truck.
That's when they switched to a Cox Cable van. But that's not nearly as fun to type as "Tastykake Truck", so I left them alone after that.
And so my husband became known as Mr. Tastykake on some of my MBs because I had never told anyone his name for privacy reasons, and also because it's just such a fun word: Tastykake. Tastykake, tastykake, tastykake!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Video: Scrapbook Mini Album
Lately I've been playing around with YouTube and making some videos and I decided to make one of the Christmas mini album I created. I was inspired to do this by Ali Edwards's December Daily project which she hosts every year on her blog. I hope you enjoy!
Almost all products are from the Making Memories "Fa La La" product line.
Thanks for watching!
Almost all products are from the Making Memories "Fa La La" product line.
Thanks for watching!
Sunday, January 25, 2009
The {Not So} Incredible Shrinking Woman
When I started this blog I weighed 235 pounds on a good day (gag!) and I now weigh 220 pounds on a bad day. The majority of those pounds have been lost since September 1, 2008, as I was still pretty much 235 when we arrived in Miami. It pains me to write these numbers, because while it is progress -- and good progress at that -- 220 is still 220. I don't think I'm ready to excited yet. Proud? Yes. Determined? Yes. Stronger, faster, fitter? All of the above.
I've recently determined that my workout routines were not vigorous enough, so I have upped my resistance on my workout machine (doubled it actually from 12.5% of max resistance to 25% of max resistance). My goal now will be to push myself harder to bring my speed back to where it was when I upped the resistance. Once I get it back there, I'll just up the resistance some more. And on and on. Congratulations on a job well done! Now work harder you lazy piece of shit!
Sometimes it really feels like a form of torture. Work hard so you can work harder. Always striving after a goal that has been completely out of my reach for my entire adult life. Like Tantalus. Only my problem is not getting enough to eat -- that hasn't been my problem for years. Lately I feel more like the other guy. You know, the one with the boulder and the hill? Good old whathisname. Lucky for him exercise bikes hadn't been invented or his punishment might have been way more tedious than shoving a boulder up a hill. Oh, well, at least I have cable to keep me entertained while I toil.
I actually don't know why I sound so cranky right now. Probably because I'm tired. I haven't been sleeping well lately. It happens. When it comes own to it, I haven't been slept well for over a decade so this is nothing new. Just have to deal with it. Keep getting up, keep working out, keep drinking plenty of water.
If someone would just pay me to lose this weight, it seems like I could do it. I've always been good at my jobs.
I've recently determined that my workout routines were not vigorous enough, so I have upped my resistance on my workout machine (doubled it actually from 12.5% of max resistance to 25% of max resistance). My goal now will be to push myself harder to bring my speed back to where it was when I upped the resistance. Once I get it back there, I'll just up the resistance some more. And on and on. Congratulations on a job well done! Now work harder you lazy piece of shit!
Sometimes it really feels like a form of torture. Work hard so you can work harder. Always striving after a goal that has been completely out of my reach for my entire adult life. Like Tantalus. Only my problem is not getting enough to eat -- that hasn't been my problem for years. Lately I feel more like the other guy. You know, the one with the boulder and the hill? Good old whathisname. Lucky for him exercise bikes hadn't been invented or his punishment might have been way more tedious than shoving a boulder up a hill. Oh, well, at least I have cable to keep me entertained while I toil.
I actually don't know why I sound so cranky right now. Probably because I'm tired. I haven't been sleeping well lately. It happens. When it comes own to it, I haven't been slept well for over a decade so this is nothing new. Just have to deal with it. Keep getting up, keep working out, keep drinking plenty of water.
If someone would just pay me to lose this weight, it seems like I could do it. I've always been good at my jobs.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Baby, It's Cold Outside
I feel bad writing this because things are much worse for pretty much everyone in the country, but it has been ... chilly ... the last few days. Now, before you go to www.weather.com and see that we have a high of 70 degrees today & then come back here and jump all over my case because people in Minnesota have a low of -70 degrees and I am just a whining, I will say that the temps have been in the 50's. I don't know where the Weather Channel is getting these highs. And that represents about a thirty degree temperature drop from what we've been used to -- pretty much overnight.
And that sucks.
In other news, my workout regimen has been successful & I have lost fifteen pounds since moving to Miami. I have gotten more muscles and am stronger and faster. My goals for the next six months is to lose an additional 25 pounds, and to lose 55 pounds this year. We'll see how it goes -- I am well on my way and things are going smoothly.
My sister is considering a move to Miami and we have been tossing around an idea for an informal "TV" show (read: YouTube) that we will be working on when she arrives. I have been practicing my video editing skills (which are pretty much nonexistent -- I basically sucked hard and now suck only a little) so that I can maybe put something together that's not so poorly edited it's distracting. That's my lofty goal. If she does move down here, and if we do end up working on the videos, they would start "airing" this summer.
And that sucks.
In other news, my workout regimen has been successful & I have lost fifteen pounds since moving to Miami. I have gotten more muscles and am stronger and faster. My goals for the next six months is to lose an additional 25 pounds, and to lose 55 pounds this year. We'll see how it goes -- I am well on my way and things are going smoothly.
My sister is considering a move to Miami and we have been tossing around an idea for an informal "TV" show (read: YouTube) that we will be working on when she arrives. I have been practicing my video editing skills (which are pretty much nonexistent -- I basically sucked hard and now suck only a little) so that I can maybe put something together that's not so poorly edited it's distracting. That's my lofty goal. If she does move down here, and if we do end up working on the videos, they would start "airing" this summer.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Snow in Miami
Tonight we're going to the Dolphin Mall which makes snow every night the mall is open during the holiday season. Mr. Tastykake needs to get a present for his Secret Santa, and I wanted to see some snow with my palm trees -- how cute is that?
We also need to do some more cleaning and decorating around the house, although our tree, nativity scene and advent wreath are up. We also have to go to the dreaded Wal-Mart for some stuff.
We also need to do some more cleaning and decorating around the house, although our tree, nativity scene and advent wreath are up. We also have to go to the dreaded Wal-Mart for some stuff.
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
December Madness
So, December is a super busy month for me. I need to get the house completely cleaned, unpacked and ready for visitors. Plus, I need to decorate it for Christmas on top of that.
Then I have my baby album project to work on, as well as my Christmas album (which is coming right along -- I love it. And we have Cirque du Soleil, plus friends coming into Orlando & a trip to Disney World.
On top of it all, I have my daily workouts and my photography and all kinds of other stuff going on -- Christmas shopping, meal planning, etc.
Whew! I'm tired already.
Then I have my baby album project to work on, as well as my Christmas album (which is coming right along -- I love it. And we have Cirque du Soleil, plus friends coming into Orlando & a trip to Disney World.
On top of it all, I have my daily workouts and my photography and all kinds of other stuff going on -- Christmas shopping, meal planning, etc.
Whew! I'm tired already.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
New Rule
No exercising after dinner or 7:00 p.m., whichever comes first, or you will become so energized that you will not be able to get to sleep until 5:00 in the morning.
I honestly don't remember the last time I was this tired. Sheesh.
In other new, I am starting a business venture with a friend of mine. She and I are going to collaborate on the creation of a custom scrapbooked baby album. When it's complete, she will teach the class in a Northern Virginia scrapbook store & we will split the proceeds. If all goes well, I might try to shop it around to stores in the Miami area and/or possible sell kits on Etsy or completed albums on eBay. It's exciting!
I ordered all the supplies we need and am anxiously awaiting their arrival so I can get going. I have tons of ideas swirling around my fevered, sleep-deprived brain that are just dying to get out onto pretty paper.
I honestly don't remember the last time I was this tired. Sheesh.
In other new, I am starting a business venture with a friend of mine. She and I are going to collaborate on the creation of a custom scrapbooked baby album. When it's complete, she will teach the class in a Northern Virginia scrapbook store & we will split the proceeds. If all goes well, I might try to shop it around to stores in the Miami area and/or possible sell kits on Etsy or completed albums on eBay. It's exciting!
I ordered all the supplies we need and am anxiously awaiting their arrival so I can get going. I have tons of ideas swirling around my fevered, sleep-deprived brain that are just dying to get out onto pretty paper.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Only in Florida ...
... would you wake up to this email from your husband:
A baby lizard escaped into the house when I opened the door this morning. I swear it was like he was waiting for the door to open! It's maybe three inches long and might show up somewhere in the house.
I got my camera and went on a lizard hunt -- I wanted to get a snapshot of him to share online, but he must be hiding in or under something because I cannot see him anywhere. I just hope I don't accidentally step on him or sit on him & squish him.
A baby lizard escaped into the house when I opened the door this morning. I swear it was like he was waiting for the door to open! It's maybe three inches long and might show up somewhere in the house.
I got my camera and went on a lizard hunt -- I wanted to get a snapshot of him to share online, but he must be hiding in or under something because I cannot see him anywhere. I just hope I don't accidentally step on him or sit on him & squish him.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Meat Puppets
So, I have this theory. I suppose that it's technically a conspiracy theory, although I don't usually go in for that sort of thing.
Basically, my theory is that several well known world leaders are not actually alive anymore. They have been replaced by state-of-the-art meat puppets and are used as front men for shadow governments to act out their evil plans.
Up until the last few weeks my list had contained Ted Kennedy (the prototype meat puppet & actually not a very good model -- that's why he has now developed a "brain tumor" since they need to get him offline before he becomes too much more of an embarrassment) and Fidel Castro.
As far as Ted Kennedy, I think it's pretty obvious. First of all, it's not even that great of a meat puppet. Even before the alleged brain tumor the man could hardly speak or stand up straight. Does anyone believe that he has lived this long without contracting cirrhosis or some kind of system-wide venereal disease? I know -- seems very unlikely.
And Fidel, well, does Raoul Castro actually expect us to believe that he is just fine and dandy and that's why he handed over the reigns to the government? Fidel's last day on earth was most likely the day he collapsed with a perforated bowel after that speech. Do they think we're idiots? A perforated bowel? No one in their 70s survives a perforated bowel & then continues on with business as usual. No, what really happened is that Fidel Castro died & Raoul was afraid that if he just announced that there would be mass panic and revolts and he would lose his power base. So he is slowly announcing that Fidel Castro is getting sicker and sicker while giving freedoms back to the people of Cuba. Quite crafty really.
I have decided that I now need to add North Korea's Kim Jong Il to the list of MPs. A few weeks ago he suffered what was, according to the North Korean news service (who can believe a word they print, anyway?) a MILD stroke. Now, according to the South Koreans (who I presume are relying on some sort of covert intelligence or espionage -- either that or they're just making it up to make the North Koreans look shifty) his stroke was severe and he had to be rushed into brain surgery. I don't know about you, but I would rather not have brain surgery in North Korea -- thanks anyway.
Well, the "Kim is Sicker than North Korea Wants to Admit" side seemed to gain more credence recently when North Korea released pictures of a hale and hearty Kim Jong Il at some recent publicity appearances. They probably would have been much more impressive if they hadn't been obviously doctored. Whoops.
So, I think he's been added to the ranks of the Meat Puppets. Have you noticed that all the Meat Puppets so far are communists? What do you mean Ted Kennedy's not a communist!? Have you seen his voting record?
Basically, my theory is that several well known world leaders are not actually alive anymore. They have been replaced by state-of-the-art meat puppets and are used as front men for shadow governments to act out their evil plans.
Up until the last few weeks my list had contained Ted Kennedy (the prototype meat puppet & actually not a very good model -- that's why he has now developed a "brain tumor" since they need to get him offline before he becomes too much more of an embarrassment) and Fidel Castro.
As far as Ted Kennedy, I think it's pretty obvious. First of all, it's not even that great of a meat puppet. Even before the alleged brain tumor the man could hardly speak or stand up straight. Does anyone believe that he has lived this long without contracting cirrhosis or some kind of system-wide venereal disease? I know -- seems very unlikely.
And Fidel, well, does Raoul Castro actually expect us to believe that he is just fine and dandy and that's why he handed over the reigns to the government? Fidel's last day on earth was most likely the day he collapsed with a perforated bowel after that speech. Do they think we're idiots? A perforated bowel? No one in their 70s survives a perforated bowel & then continues on with business as usual. No, what really happened is that Fidel Castro died & Raoul was afraid that if he just announced that there would be mass panic and revolts and he would lose his power base. So he is slowly announcing that Fidel Castro is getting sicker and sicker while giving freedoms back to the people of Cuba. Quite crafty really.
I have decided that I now need to add North Korea's Kim Jong Il to the list of MPs. A few weeks ago he suffered what was, according to the North Korean news service (who can believe a word they print, anyway?) a MILD stroke. Now, according to the South Koreans (who I presume are relying on some sort of covert intelligence or espionage -- either that or they're just making it up to make the North Koreans look shifty) his stroke was severe and he had to be rushed into brain surgery. I don't know about you, but I would rather not have brain surgery in North Korea -- thanks anyway.
Well, the "Kim is Sicker than North Korea Wants to Admit" side seemed to gain more credence recently when North Korea released pictures of a hale and hearty Kim Jong Il at some recent publicity appearances. They probably would have been much more impressive if they hadn't been obviously doctored. Whoops.
So, I think he's been added to the ranks of the Meat Puppets. Have you noticed that all the Meat Puppets so far are communists? What do you mean Ted Kennedy's not a communist!? Have you seen his voting record?
Sunday, November 09, 2008
Christians Not Included
Mr. Tastykake and I have a Sunday routine of getting up, making a lavish breakfast of pancakes, bacon, eggs, etc., and going through the Sunday paper. I look through the front section and he looks for the comics and circulars. Today he was looking through that giant circular that Toys R Us sends around each year to get kids to nag their parents incessantly for overpriced toys. If you have kids, you know the one. If you have kids, you probably curse the day when Toys R Us came out with this book.
Anyway, today Mr. Tastykake was flipping through it and I happened to glance up from a scintillating article in the Miami Herald entitled "Why Obama Won in Florida" to look over at it and see something that looked like a castle. I pointed to it and said "I want that!" in my best imitation of a greedy four year old. He said, "You don't even know what that is" and promptly covered it with his hand. I said, "Yes, I do -- it's a princess castle! I want a princess castle!!!"
It turns out, I was wrong. It was, in fact, a Roman Arena. He pointed to the title and then said, "Look, there's a lion and everything!" Included with the set is actually a lion figurine. We both kind of stared at it in stunned silence before he said "Christians not included" at the same time that I said "Where's the little Christian figurine to feed the lions?"
Now, I do not find the Roman persecution of Christians amusing in the slightest. On the other hand, what kind of sick and twisted mind came up with the idea of giving children a roman arena to play with during their formative years? And why, for the love all that is good and holy does it have a five star rating at the Toys R Us website!?
Anyway, today Mr. Tastykake was flipping through it and I happened to glance up from a scintillating article in the Miami Herald entitled "Why Obama Won in Florida" to look over at it and see something that looked like a castle. I pointed to it and said "I want that!" in my best imitation of a greedy four year old. He said, "You don't even know what that is" and promptly covered it with his hand. I said, "Yes, I do -- it's a princess castle! I want a princess castle!!!"
It turns out, I was wrong. It was, in fact, a Roman Arena. He pointed to the title and then said, "Look, there's a lion and everything!" Included with the set is actually a lion figurine. We both kind of stared at it in stunned silence before he said "Christians not included" at the same time that I said "Where's the little Christian figurine to feed the lions?"
Now, I do not find the Roman persecution of Christians amusing in the slightest. On the other hand, what kind of sick and twisted mind came up with the idea of giving children a roman arena to play with during their formative years? And why, for the love all that is good and holy does it have a five star rating at the Toys R Us website!?
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
It's Finally Over. Finally. Over.
This election has exhausted me more than any other. It probably has something to do with being in a hotly contested state -- something I am not used to since Virginia was essentially ignored during the last two campaigns. Florida, however, was Ground Zero in many ways this time around. I saw so many ads -- in the paper, on TV, in fliers, etc. -- received phone calls to vote for this or that candidate, basically just bombarded around every turn. By the time election day rolled around I was so ready for it to just be done I almost didn't care anymore.
It's an historic election, to be sure -- the first black president of the United States of America. The first non-white male president of the United States. Now if we could just get a woman elected! :) It's important in so many ways -- I can see why Jesse Jackson was in tears. Barack Obama is actual living proof that those of us living in this country are limited only by our own energy. Whatever we want to be, we can be it.
Maybe we all didn't agree with his politics or his message, and that's okay, too. That's what living in this country gives us: the freedom to disagree with someone's politics and not be shot or imprisoned. But now that the election is finally over, we all need to work together to rebuild this country. With the war and the economy and everything else, we need to put our differences aside and try to come together to ensure that things will get better from here.
It's an historic election, to be sure -- the first black president of the United States of America. The first non-white male president of the United States. Now if we could just get a woman elected! :) It's important in so many ways -- I can see why Jesse Jackson was in tears. Barack Obama is actual living proof that those of us living in this country are limited only by our own energy. Whatever we want to be, we can be it.
Maybe we all didn't agree with his politics or his message, and that's okay, too. That's what living in this country gives us: the freedom to disagree with someone's politics and not be shot or imprisoned. But now that the election is finally over, we all need to work together to rebuild this country. With the war and the economy and everything else, we need to put our differences aside and try to come together to ensure that things will get better from here.
Friday, October 17, 2008
And the Title of Worst Blogger Ever Goes To ...
... Me!
Whew! I wouldn't say I've 100% "settled in" here in Miami, but I am definitely on my way. It is somewhat disappointing/frustrating to me that the only rooms of the house that I can check off as "done" are the Master Bedroom and the Kitchen, but I suppose that is better than having no rooms done & I have only myself to blame at this point anyway.
I have been doing a great deal of scrapbooking lately. I think I will make mini albums for most of my friends and family this year (complete with pictures, when available!) so that we can keep the number of gifts we buy to a minimum. And in order for this to be really a cost-saving idea, I'll need to scrap from my stash instead of buying all new product for these projects. Which is fine. I already got started today with a mini album for my friend Heather about her bachelorette party/lingerie shower. I took really great pictures that night (if I say so myself) and she has wanted an album with those pictures for a while but hasn't made the time to get them developed & put into an album. So I will make her a 4" x 7" album with all those pictures. She should love it.
I'm also going to make books for my sister & my friends Katie & Kim. I already know what the "themes" will be for those three albums, so that's nice. Possibly I will make an album for my mom if I can think of a good theme. If not, I may just get her one of my leftover album kits from the design team I participate in. It's a great kit & would be a ton of fun for her to put together. Plus the colors are really bright & summery, which would be great for scrapping her pics of her Florida Christmas.
Things are going really well for me. I haven't updated the blog because I've been feeling like I haven't had much to say. This is mostly because I am very unstressed & just relaxing and being peaceful. Which, while it feels wondrous, doesn't give me much to chit chat about. Unless you want to hear about the latest episode of Fringe or see pictures of my weird sunburn (which is now a weird tan).
We did go to the Miami Seaquarium this past Monday, so here is a picture I took of some dolphins.
I had no idea that the TV show Flipper was filmed there (well, at least the dolphin parts) or that Flipper was actually played by seven dolphins (I guess different dolphins are better at different sorts of tricks, maybe?), so there's a bit of interesting trivia for ya!
Whew! I wouldn't say I've 100% "settled in" here in Miami, but I am definitely on my way. It is somewhat disappointing/frustrating to me that the only rooms of the house that I can check off as "done" are the Master Bedroom and the Kitchen, but I suppose that is better than having no rooms done & I have only myself to blame at this point anyway.
I have been doing a great deal of scrapbooking lately. I think I will make mini albums for most of my friends and family this year (complete with pictures, when available!) so that we can keep the number of gifts we buy to a minimum. And in order for this to be really a cost-saving idea, I'll need to scrap from my stash instead of buying all new product for these projects. Which is fine. I already got started today with a mini album for my friend Heather about her bachelorette party/lingerie shower. I took really great pictures that night (if I say so myself) and she has wanted an album with those pictures for a while but hasn't made the time to get them developed & put into an album. So I will make her a 4" x 7" album with all those pictures. She should love it.
I'm also going to make books for my sister & my friends Katie & Kim. I already know what the "themes" will be for those three albums, so that's nice. Possibly I will make an album for my mom if I can think of a good theme. If not, I may just get her one of my leftover album kits from the design team I participate in. It's a great kit & would be a ton of fun for her to put together. Plus the colors are really bright & summery, which would be great for scrapping her pics of her Florida Christmas.
Things are going really well for me. I haven't updated the blog because I've been feeling like I haven't had much to say. This is mostly because I am very unstressed & just relaxing and being peaceful. Which, while it feels wondrous, doesn't give me much to chit chat about. Unless you want to hear about the latest episode of Fringe or see pictures of my weird sunburn (which is now a weird tan).
We did go to the Miami Seaquarium this past Monday, so here is a picture I took of some dolphins.
I had no idea that the TV show Flipper was filmed there (well, at least the dolphin parts) or that Flipper was actually played by seven dolphins (I guess different dolphins are better at different sorts of tricks, maybe?), so there's a bit of interesting trivia for ya!
Friday, September 12, 2008
We're Here!
This will not be a long post, since we don't have access to the Internet and won' t until the 19th or so. That is a long story fraught with much drama, so I won't be getting into it now. I am posting this from my iPhone so you will at least know that I am alive, though, and not worry that I have been eaten by alligators or blown away by Hurricane Ike.
Suffice it to say that we made it to Miami & so did our stuff. We found an apartment and are unpacking now, but it is taking forever. Sheesh. We have so much stuff - good thing we got rid of half of if before we left or there would be no room to move around in here!
Suffice it to say that we made it to Miami & so did our stuff. We found an apartment and are unpacking now, but it is taking forever. Sheesh. We have so much stuff - good thing we got rid of half of if before we left or there would be no room to move around in here!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Doctor Fish
So, tonight I am going with my friend to have my feet eaten by carp.
Actually, I am going to pay -- no-kidding real money -- to have my feet eaten by carp.
Hundreds of tiny, toothless carp will chew all the dead skin off my feet in some kind of exotic new pedicure.
Oh yeah, and these fish are called Doctor Fish. So I suppose they have received adequate medical training in order to complete this procedure.
Don't worry -- I'm bringing my camera.
Actually, I am going to pay -- no-kidding real money -- to have my feet eaten by carp.
Hundreds of tiny, toothless carp will chew all the dead skin off my feet in some kind of exotic new pedicure.
Oh yeah, and these fish are called Doctor Fish. So I suppose they have received adequate medical training in order to complete this procedure.
Don't worry -- I'm bringing my camera.
Saturday, August 16, 2008
I Give Up
I should have known better than to excited about anything rlated to the move to Miami. Not only did that triplex turn out to have some serious problems (not with the place itself so much as with the owner & their laid-back attitude about everything -- including city ordinances and proper insurance coverage -- yuck) but the condo we saw after it & loved has an issue. Namely that it's fully furnished & that if you want to ent it unfurnished, that costs extra. ::sigh:: So I am once again at the point where I want to say the hell with it, just give up, and live in a hotel on the military's dime. It's their fault I'm in this mess anyway.
Jerks.
Jerks.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Moving Day is Almost Here
I realize it has been a little while since my last blog post. Work absolutely exploded into insanity last week and I just barely survived. Thankfully, that is all over and I am heading into my last week. Yay! Too bad this week will be a ride on the Hell Express in gasoline panties, but what can you do? It's only five days. How bad can it be?
So, first an update on the move. One of the movers came to visit on Friday and look at the apartment. He wanted to see what, if any, challenges there would be from our stuff, and also how many of which type of box they need. We did have one funny moment when we got to the bedroom and we pointed out that our mattress was usually problematic. I told him it was a beast and every mover we've ever had has complained about it. He asked if it was a pillowtop and I said it was but that wasn't the entire issue. The sad fact is that our mattress is not only the heaviest mattress on the planet, but it also has no handles. What followed was this entertaining exchange:
Mover Man: "No handles! Who ever heard of a mattress with no handles!?"
Me: "Yeah, it's annoying. Just make sure they bring a hump strap and it should be no problem."
Note: A "Hump Strap" is a device which, in my opinion, looks like a giant seatbelt. Movers use it to put large objects on their backs and "hump" them down the stairs or whatever. I am not making this up. See image below for a visual. No, it's not dirty.
Mover Man: "Hump Strap!?"
Me: "Yeah, a hump strap. It's that thing --"
Mover Man: "I know what a hump strap is. I've just never heard that phrase used outside of moving circles. I thought it was exclusive to the industry."
Me: "Oh, well, we move a lot."
Mover Man: "38 years of moving and not once has a woman ever said to me 'hump strap'! I can't wait to get back to the office and tell my boss. He's never going to believe me. 38 years of moving and no one's ever said to me 'hump strap'! I can see there's no point in giving you any kind of song and dance, lady, 'cause you'd see right through it. Hump strap!"
Anywho, so now you know how not to be screwed by movers. Just casually drop the term 'hump strap' into the conversation and you'll be all set.
Now, we think we may have found a place to live. It's a unit in a triplex on Miami Beach. It's in North Beach, near Surfside, and it is a good size, good location, good price, good neighborhood. Lots of stuff within easy walking distance, including a library that's only half a mile away. Yay! AND it's only a block from the beach! Awesome! The Realtor went over there today to get us some extra pictures and we are waiting for her to upload them to her website. Once she does that we'll make a decision, but we are really leaning towards taking it. That would be such a huge relief and a BIG WEIGHT off my shoulders. Also, the movers would be able to take our stuff door to door which would be totally amazing. And it would enable us to be totally moved in a week before Mr. Tastykake has to report to work. Which would basically give us a week to bum around the beach and explore our new surroundings.
I am actually starting to get excited. Can you believe it?
Miami Beach, here we come. Maybe.
Oh, yeah. Also, I've been asked why my husband is called Mr. Tastykake. There is a reason, but it's a long story, so I will have to save it for another post.
So, first an update on the move. One of the movers came to visit on Friday and look at the apartment. He wanted to see what, if any, challenges there would be from our stuff, and also how many of which type of box they need. We did have one funny moment when we got to the bedroom and we pointed out that our mattress was usually problematic. I told him it was a beast and every mover we've ever had has complained about it. He asked if it was a pillowtop and I said it was but that wasn't the entire issue. The sad fact is that our mattress is not only the heaviest mattress on the planet, but it also has no handles. What followed was this entertaining exchange:
Mover Man: "No handles! Who ever heard of a mattress with no handles!?"
Me: "Yeah, it's annoying. Just make sure they bring a hump strap and it should be no problem."
Note: A "Hump Strap" is a device which, in my opinion, looks like a giant seatbelt. Movers use it to put large objects on their backs and "hump" them down the stairs or whatever. I am not making this up. See image below for a visual. No, it's not dirty.
Mover Man: "Hump Strap!?"Me: "Yeah, a hump strap. It's that thing --"
Mover Man: "I know what a hump strap is. I've just never heard that phrase used outside of moving circles. I thought it was exclusive to the industry."
Me: "Oh, well, we move a lot."
Mover Man: "38 years of moving and not once has a woman ever said to me 'hump strap'! I can't wait to get back to the office and tell my boss. He's never going to believe me. 38 years of moving and no one's ever said to me 'hump strap'! I can see there's no point in giving you any kind of song and dance, lady, 'cause you'd see right through it. Hump strap!"
Anywho, so now you know how not to be screwed by movers. Just casually drop the term 'hump strap' into the conversation and you'll be all set.
Now, we think we may have found a place to live. It's a unit in a triplex on Miami Beach. It's in North Beach, near Surfside, and it is a good size, good location, good price, good neighborhood. Lots of stuff within easy walking distance, including a library that's only half a mile away. Yay! AND it's only a block from the beach! Awesome! The Realtor went over there today to get us some extra pictures and we are waiting for her to upload them to her website. Once she does that we'll make a decision, but we are really leaning towards taking it. That would be such a huge relief and a BIG WEIGHT off my shoulders. Also, the movers would be able to take our stuff door to door which would be totally amazing. And it would enable us to be totally moved in a week before Mr. Tastykake has to report to work. Which would basically give us a week to bum around the beach and explore our new surroundings.
I am actually starting to get excited. Can you believe it?
Miami Beach, here we come. Maybe.
Oh, yeah. Also, I've been asked why my husband is called Mr. Tastykake. There is a reason, but it's a long story, so I will have to save it for another post.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Just Three More Weeks of Work
Believe it or not, I am actually starting to get excited about Miami. Yes, it will be a big change from what we expected our life to be at the end of the year, but what the hell. Life is about how you handle change. And I am looking forward to completely changing the focus of my life.
Right now my life is completely focused on holding it together. And that's all it has been for a long while. And it sucked. A lot. But soon it will be about becoming. Becoming healthier. Becoming fitter. Becoming thinner. Becoming happier. Becoming better than I am now.
Becoming.
I like the sound of that. Maybe that will become my word of the year or something.
I am going to focus on becoming the best person that I can be. The best human, wife, friend, volunteer, caretaker and unemployed bum.
Well, maybe not that last part.
I just hope all this excitement doesn't run out before we get there. We still have to do some more decluttering, figure out what we're going to take in our car with us, get everything packed and loaded onto the truck, find a place to live, move in, unpack, build furniture, find a grill, find a scooter, find a place to shop.
Yeah. There's a lot to do still.
Plus, I want to get one of those fish pedicures before I get down there. And dye my hair blue.
Sheesh. The work never ends.
Right now my life is completely focused on holding it together. And that's all it has been for a long while. And it sucked. A lot. But soon it will be about becoming. Becoming healthier. Becoming fitter. Becoming thinner. Becoming happier. Becoming better than I am now.
Becoming.
I like the sound of that. Maybe that will become my word of the year or something.
I am going to focus on becoming the best person that I can be. The best human, wife, friend, volunteer, caretaker and unemployed bum.
Well, maybe not that last part.
I just hope all this excitement doesn't run out before we get there. We still have to do some more decluttering, figure out what we're going to take in our car with us, get everything packed and loaded onto the truck, find a place to live, move in, unpack, build furniture, find a grill, find a scooter, find a place to shop.
Yeah. There's a lot to do still.
Plus, I want to get one of those fish pedicures before I get down there. And dye my hair blue.
Sheesh. The work never ends.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Consider Your Assets
When we were trying to determine what assets we possessed that we could sell to help with this big move to Miami (thank you, United States Air Force) and paying down our debt and we could only think of one: the Toyota Prius.
I just finished reading the Frugal Babe's blog post about her Jewelry Gift Card Giveaway and it got me thinking -- not just thinking about how I would love to win a $100.00 gift card, but also thinking about the diamond and platinum asset sitting on my left hand.
Now, I love my ring. I love it because it is simple and elegant and it was given to me by the love of my life. Yes, it is a symbol of our love, but it is also just an object which, while beautiful, only has power and meaning because of how I feel about Mr. Tastykake. If I woke up tomorrow morning and decided I didn't like him anymore, the ring would just be a platinum and diamond asset and nothing more, right? Not that that's likely to happen, but you see my point. :)
Out of curiosity I checked the website of the jeweler where we originally bought the ring. The same setting and band are still available. After selecting a diamond of similar size and quality, the ring priced out at over twice what we paid for it. What that means is that we could probably get close to what we paid for it if we sold it today. I am thinking this is primarily because of the sharp rise in the price of platinum since it was purchased, but there could be many reasons.
I love the Frugal Babe's idea of selling her diamond ring and replacing it with a an equally beautiful, but far less expensive, manufactured gemstone. I just wonder how I would really feel about selling my wedding ring? It has a great deal of sentimental value for me. I just have to decide if that sentimental value outweighs my disgust with our debt load.
Probably.
I wonder what other assets are hiding around the apartment, waiting to be tapped?
I just finished reading the Frugal Babe's blog post about her Jewelry Gift Card Giveaway and it got me thinking -- not just thinking about how I would love to win a $100.00 gift card, but also thinking about the diamond and platinum asset sitting on my left hand.
Now, I love my ring. I love it because it is simple and elegant and it was given to me by the love of my life. Yes, it is a symbol of our love, but it is also just an object which, while beautiful, only has power and meaning because of how I feel about Mr. Tastykake. If I woke up tomorrow morning and decided I didn't like him anymore, the ring would just be a platinum and diamond asset and nothing more, right? Not that that's likely to happen, but you see my point. :)
Out of curiosity I checked the website of the jeweler where we originally bought the ring. The same setting and band are still available. After selecting a diamond of similar size and quality, the ring priced out at over twice what we paid for it. What that means is that we could probably get close to what we paid for it if we sold it today. I am thinking this is primarily because of the sharp rise in the price of platinum since it was purchased, but there could be many reasons.
I love the Frugal Babe's idea of selling her diamond ring and replacing it with a an equally beautiful, but far less expensive, manufactured gemstone. I just wonder how I would really feel about selling my wedding ring? It has a great deal of sentimental value for me. I just have to decide if that sentimental value outweighs my disgust with our debt load.
Probably.
I wonder what other assets are hiding around the apartment, waiting to be tapped?
Thursday, July 24, 2008
It's a Car, Not a Lottery Ticket
So, Mr. Tastykake and I have been talking bout the best thing to do with the money from the sale of the Prius. Obviously the most sensible thing to do would be to pay cash for all the moving expenses and then use whatever was leftover to stock up on food and other supplies and then put the rest of it towards debt.
That's so boring.
I don't know why being sensible is so hard for me. Do I have entitlement issues? I mean, why use the money sensibly when it could be used to purchase and $1200 DSLR camera!? What's more importnt? Food or documenting our new life in Florida in the highest quality photography possible? If you answered food, you're wrong. I have enough fat on my body to feed me for months! The way I look at it, the camera would be less like a waste of money and more like a guaranteed weightloss plan. R-i-g-h-t.
This is exactly why debt is evil.
If we didn't have debt, I would have to choose between the two. We would be able to budget for the camera, pay cash for it in a month or two, all the while being able to eat food. Food that didn't consist of canned tuna and Ramen noodles. At least the food we will be eating in Florida will be organic, locally sourced foods. They'll be better for our bodies and good for my creativity. As in, what can I do with a daikon radish, a head of bok choy and a chicken breast? Epicurious.com to the rescue!
Sigh.
I suppose it will be good for me to have to make do without a $700.00 prosumer ice cream maker. Sort of like roughing it on the Oregon Trail only without the diptheria.
Damn.
That's so boring.
I don't know why being sensible is so hard for me. Do I have entitlement issues? I mean, why use the money sensibly when it could be used to purchase and $1200 DSLR camera!? What's more importnt? Food or documenting our new life in Florida in the highest quality photography possible? If you answered food, you're wrong. I have enough fat on my body to feed me for months! The way I look at it, the camera would be less like a waste of money and more like a guaranteed weightloss plan. R-i-g-h-t.
This is exactly why debt is evil.
If we didn't have debt, I would have to choose between the two. We would be able to budget for the camera, pay cash for it in a month or two, all the while being able to eat food. Food that didn't consist of canned tuna and Ramen noodles. At least the food we will be eating in Florida will be organic, locally sourced foods. They'll be better for our bodies and good for my creativity. As in, what can I do with a daikon radish, a head of bok choy and a chicken breast? Epicurious.com to the rescue!
Sigh.
I suppose it will be good for me to have to make do without a $700.00 prosumer ice cream maker. Sort of like roughing it on the Oregon Trail only without the diptheria.
Damn.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Mind Over Batter
Ah, I love puns. Not really, but what the hell.
We are in the "eating everything in our fridge, freezer and pantry because we can't take it with us to Miami and who would want to anyway?" stage of life. And I came across a box of Halloween FunFetti cake mix & the accompanying icing (with tiny pumpkin sprinkles!). I think it is a sign of sheer desperation for comfort food that I am making Halloween novelty treats. Incidentally, why did I buy these in the first place?
So weird.
In other news: less than four weeks left to work! Yay! I have three days this week and then three weeks. These will be some of the absolute busiest weeks of my career because I am wrapping up three huge projects, but at least the days will pass quickly. Not quickly enough for me, but at least things have finally stopped d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g.
Miami, here we come! Sort of. Mostly. Soon(ish).
We are in the "eating everything in our fridge, freezer and pantry because we can't take it with us to Miami and who would want to anyway?" stage of life. And I came across a box of Halloween FunFetti cake mix & the accompanying icing (with tiny pumpkin sprinkles!). I think it is a sign of sheer desperation for comfort food that I am making Halloween novelty treats. Incidentally, why did I buy these in the first place?
So weird.
In other news: less than four weeks left to work! Yay! I have three days this week and then three weeks. These will be some of the absolute busiest weeks of my career because I am wrapping up three huge projects, but at least the days will pass quickly. Not quickly enough for me, but at least things have finally stopped d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g.
Miami, here we come! Sort of. Mostly. Soon(ish).
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Gardening is Complicated
Holy crap.
I went to order the seeds for the plants that need to start in September and I realized I am completely over my head already.
September in Miami is pretty much time to start the nightshades it seems: tomatoes, peppers, eggplant, etc. I'm allergic/intolerant of most things in the nightshade family -- which is fine since I don't like the way most of them taste, anyway -- but Mr. Tastykake loves all of them, so I thought I would grow some so he can have them when he wants them & any leftovers can be given to the neighbors.
So I thought I'd start with tomatoes. There are so many of them! I mean, first of all, I didn't even know that tomatoes came in white, purple, yellow, orange and black. I just thought all tomatoes were red. And then I started reading about some that taste like peaches and nectarines! Crazy!
I just don't know enough about vegetables to even begin to plan out my space. Plus, this is probably a good time to mention that I have a black thumb when it comes to plants. I kill everything but ivy. It's shameful. I think it comes from a lack of patience and education more than a lack of inherent skill, but I wonder if I should even worry about it?
So, as an alternative to my own garden, I am thinking about using an organic, locally grown coop for a year to get better educated about local produce, growing seasons, and why we like and what we don't like. I found one in Miami that is very cheap (cheaper than shopping at a regular grocery store & completely blows Whole Foods out of the water) and provides a good variety of produce. I've been watching it for a few weeks now and they have been giving out manageable quantities of very delicious veggies that we love. So far, each cycle has only had one type of veggie we didn't like.
This is probably what I am going to end up doing. It costs the same amount of money every two weeks, so it will be easy to budget, and, between those veggies and the sides of beef, pork, lamb, etc., I will have to make very few trips to the grocery store (also a good moneysaver).
I went to order the seeds for the plants that need to start in September and I realized I am completely over my head already.
September in Miami is pretty much time to start the nightshades it seems: tomatoes, peppers, eggplant, etc. I'm allergic/intolerant of most things in the nightshade family -- which is fine since I don't like the way most of them taste, anyway -- but Mr. Tastykake loves all of them, so I thought I would grow some so he can have them when he wants them & any leftovers can be given to the neighbors.
So I thought I'd start with tomatoes. There are so many of them! I mean, first of all, I didn't even know that tomatoes came in white, purple, yellow, orange and black. I just thought all tomatoes were red. And then I started reading about some that taste like peaches and nectarines! Crazy!
I just don't know enough about vegetables to even begin to plan out my space. Plus, this is probably a good time to mention that I have a black thumb when it comes to plants. I kill everything but ivy. It's shameful. I think it comes from a lack of patience and education more than a lack of inherent skill, but I wonder if I should even worry about it?
So, as an alternative to my own garden, I am thinking about using an organic, locally grown coop for a year to get better educated about local produce, growing seasons, and why we like and what we don't like. I found one in Miami that is very cheap (cheaper than shopping at a regular grocery store & completely blows Whole Foods out of the water) and provides a good variety of produce. I've been watching it for a few weeks now and they have been giving out manageable quantities of very delicious veggies that we love. So far, each cycle has only had one type of veggie we didn't like.
This is probably what I am going to end up doing. It costs the same amount of money every two weeks, so it will be easy to budget, and, between those veggies and the sides of beef, pork, lamb, etc., I will have to make very few trips to the grocery store (also a good moneysaver).
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Baby Showers
In about an hour I leave to attend a ::barf:: baby shower, which is a ritual I wish we would do away with. Or, at least, I wish we would do away with it in its current format of cheap wine, horrid games, too much pink and too many post/menopausal women. Not that there's anything wrong with post/menopausal women outside of baby showers, but there's something about a shower that makes them act like giggly ::barf:: preteens.
This shower promises to be especially hideous as the host has asked us to prepare a "blessing" for the new mother. At some point in the shower she is going to have us form a circle around the new mother and ::barf:: lay our hands on her and ::barf:: recite our ::barf:: "blessing."
I have yet to come up with anything that is cheesy enough to fit the bill here, but I am considering saying this: "Red wine is truly the greatest blessing for the new mother. When you are too exhausted to even brush your teeth because the baby will not sleep through the night, just drink two glasses of it, wait thirty minutes, nurse her & she'll be out like a light. So will you."
Possibly it is a tad inappropriate, but, then again, I think the whole idea of the communal blessing is inappropriate and weird, so this seems to fit the established theme perfectly.
Sigh.
I don't hate baby showers because they are about babies but because they are quite possibly the lowest form of female socialization that exists today. Obviously the mother-to-be appreciates everything being done for her, and her friends and family are happy to share her joy, but, honestly, have you ever been to a baby shower that was actually fun? Admit it -- you have never left a baby shower thinking to yourself, "Wow! That was an awesome time!"
And what irks me about this is that baby showers could be fun -- other parties are fun. But for some reason we keep recycling the same tired shower games when we should be coming up with new ways to entertain ourselves during this rite of passage. What if we just had yummy snacks, good drinks (both alcoholic and non), and all sat around chatting and otherwise enjoying each other's company? Then the mom could open all her presents, everyone could "ooh" and "aah" appropriately. Add some music and possibly a room with a TV and DVD player showing childhood themed movies and it would be a way less annoying party than the rest.
This shower promises to be especially hideous as the host has asked us to prepare a "blessing" for the new mother. At some point in the shower she is going to have us form a circle around the new mother and ::barf:: lay our hands on her and ::barf:: recite our ::barf:: "blessing."
I have yet to come up with anything that is cheesy enough to fit the bill here, but I am considering saying this: "Red wine is truly the greatest blessing for the new mother. When you are too exhausted to even brush your teeth because the baby will not sleep through the night, just drink two glasses of it, wait thirty minutes, nurse her & she'll be out like a light. So will you."
Possibly it is a tad inappropriate, but, then again, I think the whole idea of the communal blessing is inappropriate and weird, so this seems to fit the established theme perfectly.
Sigh.
I don't hate baby showers because they are about babies but because they are quite possibly the lowest form of female socialization that exists today. Obviously the mother-to-be appreciates everything being done for her, and her friends and family are happy to share her joy, but, honestly, have you ever been to a baby shower that was actually fun? Admit it -- you have never left a baby shower thinking to yourself, "Wow! That was an awesome time!"
And what irks me about this is that baby showers could be fun -- other parties are fun. But for some reason we keep recycling the same tired shower games when we should be coming up with new ways to entertain ourselves during this rite of passage. What if we just had yummy snacks, good drinks (both alcoholic and non), and all sat around chatting and otherwise enjoying each other's company? Then the mom could open all her presents, everyone could "ooh" and "aah" appropriately. Add some music and possibly a room with a TV and DVD player showing childhood themed movies and it would be a way less annoying party than the rest.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Debt Free in Three Years
Mr. Tatsykake and I have a goal. It's an important goal to us. It's to be debt free by the time he retires from the military, which, thanks to his being reassigned and no longer eligible for retirement, is in three years: August 1, 2011.
I think that the biggest problem with debt is lack of freedom. Which is funny because we probably feel that using credit cards and getting into debt actually makes us free. When we use credit cards, we can buy whatever we want, whenever we want, for however much we want. Whether or not we can afford it hardly matters.
But that's not really the case. At least I don't think it is.
Because when you have debt, you're not really free. You're not free to leave your job for another one. You're not free to buy a house. You're not free to go where you want. Just pick up and go and not worry about money.
You're not even free to use the money that you get in your paycheck. How many of us work all week just so we can get a paycheck where 90% of it is already alloted for bill payments?
I hate it. I really, really hate it.
So we will be doing some interesting things in Florida to save money:
1. Buying a side of beef. Can you really beat $4.00 a pound for organic grass-fed steaks and roasts? Plus, we already have the freezer we need & a side of beef will be enough meat for me, Mr. Tastykake and any guests we could have for about a year. We're looking at about $2.50 a day per person for meats.
2. Losing a car. The Prius costs about $650.00 a month between monthly car payment, gas and insurance. I'll be selling it at the end of the month to reduce our monthly expenses as well as to get some cash to help with the move.
3. Gaining a scooter. Instead of a car, I'll be using a scooter. Not only can I pay cash for the scooter (from the sale of the Prius) as well as have plenty of cash left over. So, no car payment. Plus, I'll still have a way to get around town (to run errands, go the library, not be tied to the house) and it will probably cost about $50.00 a month for gas and insurance.
4. Cooking all meals at home. I'll have the time to experiment with new cuisines, new flavors, new recipes. Plus, I'll be able to cook healthy, organic meals from locally grown/raised meats and produce.
It should be fun. We'll reduce our expenses, I'll get fit and stay relaxed. Mr. Tastykake and I will be healthy and happy.
I think that the biggest problem with debt is lack of freedom. Which is funny because we probably feel that using credit cards and getting into debt actually makes us free. When we use credit cards, we can buy whatever we want, whenever we want, for however much we want. Whether or not we can afford it hardly matters.
But that's not really the case. At least I don't think it is.
Because when you have debt, you're not really free. You're not free to leave your job for another one. You're not free to buy a house. You're not free to go where you want. Just pick up and go and not worry about money.
You're not even free to use the money that you get in your paycheck. How many of us work all week just so we can get a paycheck where 90% of it is already alloted for bill payments?
I hate it. I really, really hate it.
So we will be doing some interesting things in Florida to save money:
1. Buying a side of beef. Can you really beat $4.00 a pound for organic grass-fed steaks and roasts? Plus, we already have the freezer we need & a side of beef will be enough meat for me, Mr. Tastykake and any guests we could have for about a year. We're looking at about $2.50 a day per person for meats.
2. Losing a car. The Prius costs about $650.00 a month between monthly car payment, gas and insurance. I'll be selling it at the end of the month to reduce our monthly expenses as well as to get some cash to help with the move.
3. Gaining a scooter. Instead of a car, I'll be using a scooter. Not only can I pay cash for the scooter (from the sale of the Prius) as well as have plenty of cash left over. So, no car payment. Plus, I'll still have a way to get around town (to run errands, go the library, not be tied to the house) and it will probably cost about $50.00 a month for gas and insurance.
4. Cooking all meals at home. I'll have the time to experiment with new cuisines, new flavors, new recipes. Plus, I'll be able to cook healthy, organic meals from locally grown/raised meats and produce.
It should be fun. We'll reduce our expenses, I'll get fit and stay relaxed. Mr. Tastykake and I will be healthy and happy.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Chicken, Anyone?
Mr. Tastykake and I have decided to commit, not only to living a simpler lifestyle in Miami, but also to being locavores (people who only eat food grown/produced within a 100 mile radius of their home). We figured it would probably be easier to do this in Miami than here, given their better climate for growing year-round and their greater access to truly fresh and beautiful seafood.
Since I won't be working and I want to live a more active lifestyle, as well as save money and practice more sustainable habits in general, I thought I might plant an organic vegetable garden. Many of my and Mr. Tastykake's favorite foods are easy to grow in the Miami climate, and it will give me something strenuous to do outside and keep me slim, tan and busy.
The biggest difficulty with organic gardening in a tropical/sub-tropical region appears to be bugs. There are many bugs in Miami, and they are large and voracious and hard to kill without chemicals.
A solution to this problem is birds. You can either take steps to make your garden bird friendly & encourage birds to stay in your garden (and eat the bugs) or you can raise chickens (hens, specifically). Raising chickens seems to have the added benefit of fresh eggs and fertilizer.
Chicken House:
So, what do you think? Bird houses & bird baths or a chicken run with three or four hens?
Chicken:
I know it sounds strange, but I'm kind of warming up to this whole chicken idea. It seems like Gingernut Rangers (the chicken above) lay about 300 eggs each year, so we're looking at about 900-1200 eggs a year from three to four chickens. (It seems that chickens are very sociable, so three is the chicken minimum) That way more eggs than we would normally eat in a year. But I could use them to make custard style ice cream, or for baking, or omelettes, etc. I could also give them to the neighbors for being such good sports regarding my backyard chickens.
Modified Miami schedule:
1. Wake Up
2. Have quick protein snack to wake up metabolism
3. Work Out
4. Have Breakfast
5. Work in garden
6. Tend to chicken run
7. Shower
8. Have Lunch
9. Change to swimsuit & read/listen to iPod/etc. while tanning
10. Swim
11. Round up chickens
12. Quick Rinse
13. Greet Mr. Tastykake, looking cute as ever
14. Have cocktails
15. Make dinner
My days are getting busier and busier. It won't be long before I'll have very little free time that doesn't involve working out, gardening, or chicken grooming.
Since I won't be working and I want to live a more active lifestyle, as well as save money and practice more sustainable habits in general, I thought I might plant an organic vegetable garden. Many of my and Mr. Tastykake's favorite foods are easy to grow in the Miami climate, and it will give me something strenuous to do outside and keep me slim, tan and busy.
The biggest difficulty with organic gardening in a tropical/sub-tropical region appears to be bugs. There are many bugs in Miami, and they are large and voracious and hard to kill without chemicals.
A solution to this problem is birds. You can either take steps to make your garden bird friendly & encourage birds to stay in your garden (and eat the bugs) or you can raise chickens (hens, specifically). Raising chickens seems to have the added benefit of fresh eggs and fertilizer.
Chicken House:
So, what do you think? Bird houses & bird baths or a chicken run with three or four hens?
Chicken:
I know it sounds strange, but I'm kind of warming up to this whole chicken idea. It seems like Gingernut Rangers (the chicken above) lay about 300 eggs each year, so we're looking at about 900-1200 eggs a year from three to four chickens. (It seems that chickens are very sociable, so three is the chicken minimum) That way more eggs than we would normally eat in a year. But I could use them to make custard style ice cream, or for baking, or omelettes, etc. I could also give them to the neighbors for being such good sports regarding my backyard chickens.
Modified Miami schedule:
1. Wake Up
2. Have quick protein snack to wake up metabolism
3. Work Out
4. Have Breakfast
5. Work in garden
6. Tend to chicken run
7. Shower
8. Have Lunch
9. Change to swimsuit & read/listen to iPod/etc. while tanning
10. Swim
11. Round up chickens
12. Quick Rinse
13. Greet Mr. Tastykake, looking cute as ever
14. Have cocktails
15. Make dinner
My days are getting busier and busier. It won't be long before I'll have very little free time that doesn't involve working out, gardening, or chicken grooming.
Monday, July 07, 2008
Busy Day
I am off from work today and I have a ton of errands to run if I am going to enjoy my day off tomorrow(birthday!).
So far the day is shaping up to be not very exciting:
1. Go to bank, deposit check from sale of TV
2. Go to Lowe's & get something framed
3. Get oil changed
4. Go to car wash/detailing place & have car detailed, inside & out
5. Go to AutoZone and purchase all new air filters
6. Get VA safety inspection done
7a. If car has no visible paint damage remaining on rear passenger door after detailing, call paintless dent repair people and make an appointment to have dent fixed (it turns out that their process requires that the paint job be intact)
7b. If car continues to have visible paint damage on rear passenger door after detailing, call MAACO and make an appointment for "Lease Turnback" servicing (repairs all dents, dings and scratches)
8. Apply direct pressure to bank account to prevent further hemorrhaging
Tomorrow is also a day off, but it will be spent at home, relaxing. Ahhh ... bliss. Now I just need to pull myself together and get going on this list -- otherwise I'll be at it all night!
So far the day is shaping up to be not very exciting:
1. Go to bank, deposit check from sale of TV
2. Go to Lowe's & get something framed
3. Get oil changed
4. Go to car wash/detailing place & have car detailed, inside & out
5. Go to AutoZone and purchase all new air filters
6. Get VA safety inspection done
7a. If car has no visible paint damage remaining on rear passenger door after detailing, call paintless dent repair people and make an appointment to have dent fixed (it turns out that their process requires that the paint job be intact)
7b. If car continues to have visible paint damage on rear passenger door after detailing, call MAACO and make an appointment for "Lease Turnback" servicing (repairs all dents, dings and scratches)
8. Apply direct pressure to bank account to prevent further hemorrhaging
Tomorrow is also a day off, but it will be spent at home, relaxing. Ahhh ... bliss. Now I just need to pull myself together and get going on this list -- otherwise I'll be at it all night!
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